WHATEVER HAPPENED TO THE NAKED TRIKE ANGEL? This article for DSM on a long-lost statue from the mall (which appears in roughly half of my books) quickly became the most popular in the magazine's history!
YA STUFF TO AVOID FROM NOW ON How many books do we need where the guy is just a variation on Seth from The OC?
HEAVY METAL VOMIT CHRISTMAS PARTY a brand new Christmas carol.
MY LIFE AS VIEWED THROUGH A SIMPSONS MARATHON The "Every Simpsons Ever" marathon was like watching my life flash before my eyes. I started writing down thoughts and memories and ended up with a post that's about halfway to novel-length.
WILL YOUR BOOK BE DATED IN FIVE YEARS? Some writers maintain that you should never, ever mention pop culture in a book. They're wrong, though. The real rule is just not to use it to show how hip you are. If I read a book from the 1960s, I want them to mention the Beatles.
EMOTIVE PORTRAITS OF IMPERIAL COMMANDER a photo series of the Star Wars figure we used to call "Imperial Stockbroker," the evil mid level management meatball for the Empire.
FIVE REASONS YOU SHOULD GO JUMP OFF A CLIFF #3 had me LOL. Enjoy your CJD!
BANNED BOOKS WEEK: GRANDPA GEOFF AND ME According to ancestry.com, Geoffory Chaucer was my 18th great grandfather. We both write dirty books!
HAIKUS FROM A BURGLAR some poems
POEM: HOWL (For Mayor McCheese) an epic poem
POEM: CITY LIMITS an award-winning poem
MY LONG HISTORY OF SELLING OUT Publishing marketable books can require compromises...but I'm not always glad I made them.
TOY COLLECTING IN THE EARLY 90s back when it was harder
ARCHAEOLOGY what can I find in my top dresser drawer?
SONGS THAT SCARED ME AS A KID I was a real chicken.
ON GREEN DAY an essay after American Idiot opened on Broadway, and some called Green Day sellouts. Again. This post went viral, and the livejournal version racked up a TON of comments.
GLUMPY: THE ELF WHO GOT DRUNK AND SAWED HIS LEG OFF Another merry tune
METALLICA: WHAT HAPPENED? A look back on late 90s Metallica.
ON "PALISADES PARK" BY COUNTING CROWS an essay that earned a shout-out from the band.
LIFE IN WAITING-FOR-STAR WARS TIME Me? I can't wait for Episodes 7-9. I barely remember life before waiting for a new Star Wars movie. I saw Jedi in the theatre late in its run at age 4, and spent the next several years waiting for the new one.
90s ALTERNATIVE AS OLDIES MUSIC Reflections on the music of my teenage years, now that they're playing them in "oldies radio" format.
MEETING HULK HOGAN I never imagined that when my life hit a low point, I'd take comfort in the wisdom of Hulk Hogan, but there I was...
BEAUTY, THE BEAST, and the FRENCH REVOLUTION. Does the Disney movie take place before or after? I say after.
DOWN BY THE BAY a short parody of literary fiction
FIRST GRADE SUCKED THE COOL OUT OF ME Pictures of me at the beginning and end of first grade are pretty shocking. Part 2.
USING NAUGHTY PLAYGROUND RHYMES IN BOOKS Advice for writers.
HALLOWEEN IN IOWA A radio commentary.